Food Porn – @Sirkastiq

My Topic is beans.

Here’s a clue: I’m a rebel.

Keep that in mind, You’ll need it.

**********

How do I start this shit?

It’s not beans.

I mean this literally, figuratively and any other-ly you can possibly think of.

This is by far one of the hardest things to do; I mean come out of my usually comfortable shell to share on a topic like this. This might take quite some time (although this varies on the speed of your comprehension and assimilation) so we might as well proceed.

I had always wondered what the connection between indigenes of Edo state and the country called Italy was but I never got to find out until recently. You see, I schooled at the prestigious University of Benin and we know it’s way better than your school so hush, let’s not start an argument here. By the time you take away the red sand, the cultists, the language, the tradition, the ancient buildings, the women with sharp tongues, the old women baring breasts, the bats at the Oba’s palace, the red and yellow official fashion colours and the jazz , then Benin can match any of the world’s top countries; The closest being Italy.

Oh! You don’t know Italy is close to Edo state? Where were you during Geography class?

So yeah, where was I?

Oh yeah…

It therefore was no surprise that I met her there. I was a fresh boy (still am by the way), staying alone in my apartment (shut up, a one room room is still an apartment) and It was one of those lonely days, you know. Those days when the clouds decide to release their pent up emotions and the earth receives it with such warmth that you feel it wherever you are. Literally chilling in my bachelor pad (shut up), a sensation passed from one part of my body to my brain. I could easily have chosen to ignore it but even my bible warns against such. I therefore decided to give in.

She wasn’t located far from me, so I just strolled in, Yes I didn’t knock because I wanted to pass a message that no one is the boss of me. I don’t need permission and such shit, Bosses don’t knock, we do stuff that isn’t knocking. I walk in and there she was, lying there, wrapped up in so much awesomeness. I’m at a loss on how to proceed.

Red light.

I stare for a bit, the blood flow to my feet ceases or maybe that was my brain losing signal, I’m not too sure. After a bit, network is restored and the blur is wiped from my face.

Amber.

I trudge on until I’m standing over her neatly arranged features. Dear God, How wonderful thou art. My hand stretches out to make contact, I’m not scared, this is dizziness, my fingers brush across her wrapper and she doesn’t as much as flinch.

Green light.

I wrap my hands around her even tighter like my life depended on that grasp and in that split second of contact, I swear something in me rose in pleasure, I’m sure you can guess what that was. Definitely, things were going to go down and it was necessary I retreated to prepare myself for what promised to be an encounter that changed my life.

A wash was necessary. Water just hot enough for me, laced with oriental spices and surrounded by heat from the fireplace nearby. Just perfect.  I started slow, breaking that awkward moment that occurs when you’re wondering how she’ll respond to your advances, she was in my arms and with the gait of a gazelle strutting defiantly, I dared her to rebuff my advances. Too late. With fervour matched only by kids unwrapping Christmas gifts, I was all over her features, parting , touching, Temperatures rose and the water was in agreement. The stiffness that is a usual characteristic of her breed was broken down as she melted with my every touch.

God, it was beautiful.

I had seen on TV how such liaisons are made even sweeter with the addition of certain ‘stimulants’ and lubricating oils. I spiced things up and raised the heat up a notch, I could sense the pleasure rising, it was time. I pressed my lips against her and allowed the coolness engulf her (just enough for my brain to depict her taste), then I sucked, yes sucked. She also loved being bitten and with each mouth contact and suck, I pleased her (and myself) with gentle nibbles essentially tasting the oils and spices.

I think it’s necessary I help you understand this situation.

I’m really not the type of guy that believes perfection should be rushed. I stand for complete pleasure and thus try to ensure that satisfaction is guaranteed whenever I get to work. I watch as she’s spread out before me, seemingly tired from the suck session, what is left of her staring at me, urging me to dare continue. I feel a sensation in my insides signifying I can still go on. Before that though…

Hesitation…

Consideration…

Sweet persuasion…

I move closer… take a quick swig of my drink to sweeten the taste of my tongue

The entire better to liquor with

Impression…she’s going to get the full extent of this work

Kendrick Lamar has nothing on me…

Control… fail

I take her into my mouth, dripping wet and all

The time is right. Fork it.

I dive in pasta inhibitions and barricades.

 

Told you this wasn’t beans.

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21 thoughts on “Food Porn – @Sirkastiq

  1. Lol..this is….idk the word, its rich in humor, takes a lot of nerve and creativity to write stuff like this, without sounding like a retard lol. The sexual innuendos abi undertones were priceless! Nicely done I must Lol..this is….idk the word, its rich in humor, takes a lot of nerve and creativity to write stuff like this, without sounding like a retard lol. The sexual innuendos abi undertones were priceless! Nicely done I must Lol..this is….idk the word, its rich in humor, takes a lot of nerve and creativity to write stuff like this, without sounding like a retard lol. The sexual innuendos abi undertones were priceless! Nicely done I must Lol..this is….idk the word, its rich in humor, takes a lot of nerve and creativity to write stuff like this, without sounding like a retard lol. The sexual innuendos abi undertones were priceless! Nicely done I must say!

    Like

  2. Wondered what was to be left with all the stripping away of the university at some pt and I started laughing…”take away this n that…” still the closes top university is in Italy? Choi! Wickedness!! Then the red light alert? HUNGER? Great post, no be beans atall.

    Like

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